I have much to muse about this Saturday morning, but I also have much to do. I’ll keep it kind of brief. This post is mostly for those of you who have been following my escapades here in LA.

A little over a week ago I was looking at losing my phone and internet service, and facing imminent repossession of my car. I was literally hours away from both, and I was sweating blood trying to figure out how to stall what seemed inevitable. I was looking at true homelessness… the real thing… with no apparent relief in sight. I was as close to total collapse, and panic, as I’ve ever been in my life.

Things can change fast. Now, a short week later, my bills are current, I’ve put down a deposit on an apartment, and I’m signing the lease and moving in on Tuesday. February and March will be a bit of a scramble yet, but by early April I’ll be in a position to live comfortably without immediate pressure to find a job for a month or two. I can work on these sites that I’ve been struggling to keep going but have had limited time for. I can even buy a new pair of shoes. The last few days have been a blur of activity — I feel like I just took a week-long ride on a Tilt-A-Whirl.

I just spent the last eight months homeless in LA, living in my car. It’s an experience I’m not likely to forget, nor do I want to. I got a street level view into the dark underbelly of our society in one of the world’s major cities. There have been heartwarming moments, but much of it is very disturbing. The real LA bears little resemblance to what you see on Hollywood Tonight.

I can put more time and effort into these blogs again. They need the attention, and I can work on some of the things I’ve wanted to do but haven’t been able to. I’m also going to start going through my notebooks and putting together a journal of my months as an LA homeless.

I haven’t photographed it much for various reasons, but I plan to keep prowling the streets and to put together a series of photos of what I’ve seen over the recent months. Life on the streets goes on for many people. I don’t like to intrude on the private hell so many are going through, but much of what is happening deserves to be seen.

I’ll probably do that with my phone, both to give the photos the gritty look the deserve, and simply to be less obvious and intrusive. Over the next weeks and months one of my projects will be to put it all together in a book, maybe an ebook or an actual Blurb hard copy book. Or maybe on a blog. A simple blog — no sidebars, no clutter, just a series of journal entries. Maybe I’ll do all of the above. We’ll see.

Anyway… so much for brevity. My next post will be done from the comfort of my own apartment with a cup of coffee in hand. Just like it used to be.

To those of you who have been following me here I’ll just say thanks, more than I can say, for your encouragement and support. The recovery is underway. Stay tuned.

pj

I wasn’t planning on doing a post like this, but it was pointed out in a comment on an earlier post that it might be interesting for others to see what I would select as a few of my best images from the past year. So… with great gnashing of teeth, and for sake of discussion, here are four photos taken during 2011 here in LA.

palm bark

hinges -- koreatown alley

eucalyptus trunk

leaf abstract

There you have it. Four photos that I think worked out pretty well. Good?… not so good?… why?… why not?…

Say what you will…

One thing that still amazes me, even after many years in photography, is how few and far between really good photographs can be. I don’t have many that would qualify.

This time of year you see many photographers post their ten or twelve favorite images from the past year. That’s cool. I enjoy looking at them.  I’m fascinated to see how an artist’s work has progressed and evolved over the last year.  Sometimes the growth and change is very striking.

I never do that kind of post simply because I can never find that many that I consider my best or my favorites. Looking over the last year, I can find maybe six or seven that I would consider significant.

It’s not that I think most of what I post to this blog isn’t any good, it’s more that I don’t intend for much of it to be finished work. It serves a different purpose. Those photographs I choose to print are finished work, while this blog serves more as a sketchbook that I make public. It’s a place to try new things, to experiment, to play a little bit, to get some feedback from the community, as well as to show those images that will get moved into the gallery. It’s a living, changing, growing thing.

So, long story short, I don’t have any best of’s or favorites to post. I haven’t made them yet…

I haven’t made any New Year’s resolutions in years. I never kept them anyway, so I figured why bother. This year I’m making one though, one I feel compelled to keep.

I’ve yet to really get a handle on how to support myself with these blogs I do. I’ve tried different things — some show promise, others are a waste of time and effort. I’ve made many false starts, made many mistakes, and I’ve missed some opportunities simply through my own ignorance and utter lack of business skills. That needs to change.

So… within a couple of months I will be bringing in some income. Before the year is out I will be a fully independent, self-supporting photographer/blogger. A tall order? Of course. Difficult? Absolutely, but seeing how things are going in these tough economic times I don’t think it’s any more difficult than trying to land a job that will actually support me. Once I reach that point it will be a lot more secure too.

By this time next year, if not sooner, I intend to make a trip to Montana to re-establish myself there. Then I can spend some time going back and forth, spending some time here in LA with my daughter and spending some time in Montana. Her and I can also do some exploring between here and there. There’s a lot of ‘west’ to get to know.

When she graduates high school and goes off to college I can move myself back to Montana for good. Once I do that it will take a couple of D-9 Cats and a truckload of dynamite to move me again.

So yes, it’s a tall order but a worthy goal. I’d better get busy… I have a lot to do.

Stay tuned, and Happy New Year.

pj

A few quick thoughts to end the year. I don’t know about you, but it’s been a rollercoaster for me.

The art world, like any healthy society, needs it’s rebels to stay fresh and vital. It needs those who are willing to rock the boat… who question the rules… who buck the prevailing trends.

It needs those who won’t settle for imitation or current fashions in art. Those who are dissatisfied with the status quo. Those who reject formulas and trendy methods.

It needs those who will counter the tastemakers — the critics, the galleries, the influential collectors, the popular artists.

It needs those fire-breathing free-thinking artists who will question authority, break new ground, stand up to accepted opinion and traditional attitudes, and stand up for true freedom of creative expression.

It needs those who won’t fit in. The misfits.

Whether one’s art is popular or not isn’t the issue. What matters is that it’s honest and real. That’s the only kind of art worth making. That’s the kind I will strive to make in 2012.

limb and cloud

No, it isn’t upside down…

You all have a happy new year, and thanks for your participation on this blog.

I hope you all had a happy and merry holiday season. I know I did.

As a new year approaches I find myself pondering the direction of this blog. I’ve never been big on New Year’s celebrations, even less enamored of resolutions, but a new year does symbolize a new beginning, a turning of the calendar back to day one in a sense.

When something isn’t working, it’s the epitome of foolishness to keep doing things the same way. Much of what I’ve been doing here isn’t working, so it’s time to overhaul this site. Either that or retire it, and I’m not ready to do that. Maybe even a new paint job is in order — I’ve been using this same theme for almost two years now. A new look might be good.  Mostly I’m cleaning out those things that haven’t been working, or don’t add to my purposes here, and keeping those elements that I think do contribute. The result will hopefully be a leaner and cleaner blog. Maybe meaner too — I’m tired of being such a nice guy…

What do I want this blog to be known for? Really only two things… thought-provoking and challenging ideas about photography and about living  life as a creative visual artist. Those thoughts may be controversial at times, they will be opinionated all of the time, and I make no claims that what I say is right for anybody but me. And…

I want it to be known for it’s photography. Photography that is honest, original, and unique.

If I take this blog back to what I first envisioned for it, If I can come close to living up to my expectations here, then maybe photomontana.net will grow to be a worthwhile part of the photography scene.

I’ll see you after the calendar turns, and may 2012 treat you well.

pj

2012 calendar -- front cover

Well, I’ve made a calendar for 2012. It doesn’t follow any seasonal format. No snow scenes for winter or wildflower photos for spring. Just twelve photographs. Thirteen counting the cover. Some are old standbys, some recent work from here in LA.

Actually I didn’t make it — I selected and sequenced the photos, and the fine folks at redbubble will make them as the thousands, or tens of thousands of orders come in. Then I can retire to a life of comfort and ease.

You can see it and order yours right here.

2012 calendar -- back cover

You hear the question quite often — what defines success?

To me, doing what is considered in our society as being ‘practical’, living someone else’s expectations, pursuing a career simply because it can make a lot of money even though it’s not really something that resonates with your spirit, living a life that satisfies society’s norms rather than your own gut instincts isn’t a successful life. Even if it makes you an uncountable fortune. It’s death on two legs.

Maybe that’s where this whole zombie and vampire craze comes from…

Question: What does success mean to you?

One thing that strikes me about photography blogging, and the community and friendships that grow out of it, is that age plays no part. Unless someone actually states their age it’s unknown, and nobody cares.

A few of us are sixty somethings, a few are fifty somethings or forty somethings. Probably the majority of bloggers are in their twenties or thirties, but I wouldn’t bet a paycheck on that even if I had one. A few are even in their teens.

None of that matters, and that’s cool. There’s a lot more exchanging of thoughts and ideas, a lot more give and take between generations going on in the blogs than there is out on the streets. How often do you see fifty year olds hanging out with twenty or thirty year olds in your day to day life? Not often. Humans tend to herd up by age group and lifestyle in the every day world, but far less so in the blogs.

I think that’s a great thing. I learn a lot from those younger than I am.